Childhood revisited

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Sure, you turned out pretty good, but is there anything you wish had been different about your childhood? If you have kids, is there anything you wish were different for them?

I felt isolated a lot as a child. First, I was mostly an only child – I have a half-sister, but she’s 19 years older than me, so we didn’t really grow up together.

Second, my mom was pretty protective, so I didn’t have the free-range childhood a lot of people had, and for that reason and a couple others, I had to learn how to quietly amuse myself at home alone.

My parents really did try with me, despite their own problems, and I’m grateful for that.

If I have children, I want them to know that they are loved & I want to provide a stable, loving environment for them, and allow them to be children.

16 thoughts on “Childhood revisited

  1. This is a good question. I’ve thought about this a lot since I’ve had kids actually. I know you are supposed to forgive your parents when you have kids and find out how hard it is. I haven’t done that though. I think I would like to be a less self centered parent than I had growing up. Not that everything has to be about the kids all the time, but I want them to know their needs are a priority.

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    • Same here – My parents would place me in the middle of their arguments often, but my main problem is that my mom was sick a lot when I was younger, so I took care of her at times and felt secondary to her illness.

      I don’t know what your childhood was like, but I think forgiving people also grants you a level of peace and allows you to move on from what happened.
      🙂 I’m glad to hear that you care about your kids so much…The world needs more good parents.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Yes it must be so hard with then kid/parent roles are reversed or at least blurred when the kid has to step up like that.
        Oh I know! I know I need to forgive, but things keep happening even as adult to open those wounds. Working on it though.
        This was a great post. Very thoughtful.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I wish I had a mama who had cared about me. The one thing I “broke” when I had my own children was the abuse cycle. I swore I would never beat them…and I never did. I tried to make them feel valuable…and I did. 🙂

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    • 😀 Thank you for doing that – it’s a difficult thing to stop carrying old family habits. One of my hopes is that (if I have children) my children won’t develop substance abuse problems, or at least they’ll be able to talk to me about it.
      It’s been a long-running cycle on both sides of my family…

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      • Oh…well, substance abuse is something else. I had no control over that. My childrens’ “father” is an alcoholic, his mama is an alcoholic and they passed the gene down to two of my children.
        My ex (Loser) likes to blame me but I had never had a drink in my life, nor had my parents or grandparents. Just what narcissists do…blame everybody else.
        One of my children is too far gone, I’m afraid. Another one is well on her way. 😦

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      • I’m sorry to hear that. The older I get, the more I feel for parents that raise addicts – it’s hard enough to see friends destroy themselves, I can’t imagine the pain of seeing a child you raised do that. Especially with some of the crap we put our parents through…ugh. I guess I’m lucky/my parents are “lucky” – they know about my alcohol problem, but they missed out on how grimy my life got with drug addiction. I think they have some sense of it…I don’t think talking about it would be good for any of us.
        I’d tell you that your ex is a piece of crap, but you know this already. Man, some of the men out there…

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      • I think that if you want to talk about it…here….it would be sort of cathartic. We can say things here that we couldn’t and wouldn’t say anywhere else.
        There are so many others who suffer from addiction and betrayal….the support and understanding is incredible.
        I have recently heard some stories from my son and what he has done and experienced…sleeping on the ground when it was 32 degrees outside….been so hungry he thought about eating his arm…and of course, wanting a drink so bad that he would do almost anything for it.
        I know he stole every piece of jewelry I had…even my wedding rings and traded them for a drink.
        And yes…some men….well, they aren’t men…they’re monsters.

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